A Gentile Yuppie: I once dated a Rabbi’s daughter, in the Hamptons. I went to a family barbeque, and he asked me, ‘Do you want cheese on your hamburger?’ and I thought, ‘Ah–this is a moment of truth–one of those key moments in a relationship, where the family will judge me–what should I say?’ and I said, ‘Yes, I would’–and then the Rabbi responded, ‘Great! Then Cheese for Everybody!’” – Bar Tabac, Boerum Hill, Brooklyn
But Two-Thirds of all Statistics are invented
Yuppie: I myself don’t watch porn, but I am told by trustworthy sources that at least two-thirds of all pornographic movies have no artistic value. – Lower East Side
Discommunication
Woman on telephone, calling someone back after having the call was dropped: Sorry, we were discommunicated. – Times Square
That’s why everyone’s in tight clothing
Overweight woman: “I honesty think there must be a shortage of fabric or material because all shirts are baby tees and all pants are to small and low on the hips, I dont get it” – Manhattan
Without a Yarmulke
Young Yuppie: You’re such a third-generation American Jew. – 6th Avenue, West Village
Yuppie Fantasies
Young Woman #1: I have to go to this “dungeon” for my Sexual Psychology class. Do you want to come?
Young Woman #2 in her mid-twenties: Is it like an S&M thing?
Young Woman #1: I don’t know. It’s like they act out different sexual
fantasies with whips and stuff.
Young Woman #2: OK, that sounds cool.
– Upper East Side
The language of chickens
Middle-aged Man: “you know how people all over the world, chinese, african, whatever, they look different”
Middle-aged woman: “”well no matter where you go the chickens of the world, they look the same, ever thought about that”
Middle-aged Man: “I wonder if they speak the same language?”
– McDonald’s, by the corner of Houston & Hudson
The New York Marginalized
Columbia University student #1: The most marginalized group on campus are the college Republicans
Columbia University student #2: No, it’s the Christians
– Private get-together of Columbia students, East Village
But aren’t they the same anyway?
Man in a full-length fur coat: “I’m a socialist monarchist. I believe in helping the people, but the people can’t help themselves.” – W 83rd Post Office
The Junior Family
Yuppie: “Is Freddie Prinze Jr. Harry Connick Jr.’s son?” – Streetcorner in Midtown