Guy: Man, you think Lee Harvey Oswald had good aim? You should meet my wife. –B train Overheard by: Jess Issacharoff Woman: Her bridal shower was her sweet sixteen. –F train Queer on cell: Hi, Sweetie!…What? You got married? But honey, you’re gay! –63rd & 3rd Chick on cell: So did I tell you about the e-mail I got? This guy I met on-line, on Nerve–we went out on like three dates, like a year and a half ago. Yeah, so I got an e-mail from his wife and she was like, “Yo bitch, stay away from my husband.” So I wrote back, “Don’t e-mail me, e-mail your husband who’s been cheating on you for two fucking years.” –33rd & Park Teen girl: Yeah, he’s really lonely since his wife died 3 years ago. Now his best friend is his right hand and some skin lotion. –Park Slope Guy: Hey, how’s my wife and your kids? –55th & Madison Overheard by: Matt Man on cell: I ain’t trying to see you nothin’. I want to marry you. I’m tellin you the truth. T-R-U-F-F. The Truth! –Atlantic Avenue gas station Overheard by: Megan Gate agent: You need to listen to me. Don’t listen to your wife. Your wife doesn’t work here. –Newark airport Overheard by: jk