Stranger, to young business woman: Can I spank you? –42nd St & 5th Ave Gay co-worker, to female employee: Put your hands on the desk and assume the position. –Office, midtown Overheard by: Ariella Pink Girl: If I have to, I’ll pull down my pants and spank myself. –Cilantro, 89th & 2nd Overheard by: Jules Woman on cell: I mean, he’s my kid, and everyone is curious, and if he’s going to experiment let him. But I told this guy, “You cannot be the experiment with my son!”…I know, he thinks he’s going to grow up to be a rapist! –Hunter College Overheard by: Collegiate Cutie Queer: Then we went underneath the staircase and fooled around. And then he grabbed my head, pulled it down, and licked my bald spot! –El Cocotero, 18th St between 7th and 8th Tween girl: Aww, no, he did not just pee on me! –54th & 11th Overheard by: office peon Man on cell: Natalie? Nat, if you’re there, pick up! Oh my God, I just hooked up with a guy whose house smelled like cat pee, and he wanted me to spit in his face! Where the fuck are you? –52nd & 2nd Queer: What? I’m not the one who had sex with the chicken cutlet. –83rd & Madison Twink on cell: We met on the train…No, he’s a bottom…I don’t think I can have this conversation here right now. You’re making me feel awkward. –Rite Aid, 22nd & 9th British girl on cell: Hmm, there’s no answer. She must be whipping now. –47th & 9th Overheard by: Anthony Pregnant girl: I like it when he hits me. You know, I hit him just so he could hit me back. I like it rough. –Downtown A train Chick on cell: She just told me a story about someone waking up with a dildo in her mouth. You need to meet this girl! –125th & Broadway Overheard by: McF Customer to waitress: And then you have bestiality with a man and a sheep, and the sheep is the clear victim… –Santa Fe Steakhouse, 70th Road, Forest Hills Overheard by: Dining out Brunette: What would make you think that I would like getting hit in the face with your cock? –St. John’s & 7th, Brooklyn Overheard by: Cowboy