Wednesday One-Liners Make the Beast With Two Backs

Overweight hobo: The only things I look forward to in life are mayonnaise and sex!

--57th & 7th


Woman on cell: When sex turns into math, you've got trouble on your hands.

--Union Square

Overheard by: McFreaky


Chick, screaming into cell: What a bitch! I swear, it's getting harder and harder to fuck your co-worker and get away without people finding out!

--JFK

Overheard by: Pixie


Realist on cell: Well you can't expect every guy you sleep with to call you back.

--53rd & 6th


Man to female date: So, basically, you sleep with people out of hilarity?

--St Mark's & 2nd

Overheard by: Diane


Business woman: No, I told her I'd rather have sex with my husband than buy her products. And then she hung up on me.

--Chipotle, 22nd & 6th