Man: I can’t leave my door unlocked in the Barrio. Someone might sneak in and steal all my spices. –42nd & Ditmars, Astoria Man on cell: Now why the fuck would you go and eat my ravioli? Dat’s mine! –42nd & Lex Overheard by: Danny Black tween girl: And that nigga bitch Rihanna thinks she can do ballet? Shit! I can do ballet. The only thing I ever seen that nigga do right is eat fried chicken. –Q train Overheard by: kb Woman: I mean, I would have loved rice. We all would have loved rice. –8th St between 1st & 2nd Overheard by: Jaya Chick: The other day I ate a hot dog, and it had a bone in it. I don’t know what animal they make hot dogs out of, but I’m pretty sure they don’t have bones. –34th & 7th Overheard by: seth kleinman Girl: Food is like candy. –92nd & Broadway Shrewd observer: He is either in the Army or chews a lot of gum. –Ludlow & Rivington Overheard by: pete Lanpr Lady: There ain’t no way I’m standing in front of a stove all day making tuna salad. It’s fucking hot! –104th & Broadway Overheard by: Fatty McFingers Queer: Oh my God, cottage cheese is albino diarrhea. –City Diner, 90th & Broadway Man to child in stroller: What do you want? You want money? Do you want money or a bagel? –Absolut Bagels, 108th & Broadway Overheard by: another jew Chick on cell: …No, not years of porn, ears of corn! Corn, like you eat! –Ding Dong’s, 106th & Columbus Overheard by: Jas Passionate woman: I just love egg white! It’s like painting to me! The texture, the smell… –17th & Broadway Overheard by: Shivvers Pringles lover: Yeah, he’s, like, all that minus the bag of chips. –14th St between 5th & 6th Overheard by: the chips Big black dude: So tell me, how much would it cost to get a huuuuge jar of mayonnaise, outta state? –Uptown 5 train