Wednesday One-Liners Always Thought Slim Goodbody Was Hot

Woman: You better get that uvula home soon!

--Brooklyn bound F train

Overheard by: PoisonIvy


Cracked-Out queer, holding US Weekly: Mmmmmm, Ashlee lookin' good! You know why? Whole lotta crack in her belly!

--1 train


Guy: So they took out my spleen and rummaged through my internal organs...

--1 train

Overheard by: sara n.


Woman on cell: I can't believe it; your brain muscle must be telepathetic or something!

--18th & Park

Overheard by: edward


Vendor: What if they test it and find that it's from his ear?!

--Wooster & Broome


Professor: My favorite magazine is one for undertakers. It's called Caskets and Sunnyside. You can order ears. Right ears, left ears; there's a market for them.

--Fordham

Overheard by: Jess McGins


Chick on cell: Wait, your uterus is what? What? Your uterus is what?! I'm on the street. I can't hear--Oh, tilted! That's totally fucked up. I'm sorry.

--23rd & 6th