Queer arguing with boyfriend: I’m just saying, I think it’s weird you shaved your balls and bought porn the one night that I was out of town. –Outside Bergdorf’s, 5th Ave Creepster on cell: Yeah, I wanted to tell you that I have that girl ready… The one for the video… You can’t hear me? I’m on a bus, not an airplane! It’s not like I have a cigar in my mouth or anything, and you’re telling me you can’t understand what I’m saying… Yes, I have her ready for the video… The girl! … About twenty minutes… Do you have Viagra in your house? Well go get some! You need Viagra so you can be hard for our movie! –M4 bus Overheard by: Hoping the 3rd grader next to me wasn’t paying attention Queer on cell: I saw the most fucked-up porno the other day. This guy took his boot off, then smacked this other guy in the face with it, then came all over the table, and then made the other guy lick it up… Oddly enough, I was turned on by it. So, if you ever want to smack me with your boot, give me a call. –23rd St & 8th Ave Man sprinting up subway stairs: Hey, man, where peep shows at? –33rd St & 8th Ave Overheard by: Brian 20-something chick: He says we’ll all be sleeping in a farm house with a pornographer at her wedding. –Dallas BBQ, Upper East Side Overheard by: Nipples