Wednesday One-Liners Always Have a Date

Man on cell: I had never used a dildo before, you know? It's just never come up, I guess. So I think, 'Okay, I'm not that young anymore -- I'll take what I can get...' and it was going fine, but then I didn't know you're not supposed to shove it in that fast...

--14th St & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Peter L

Dude on cell: Why would I get the pink one? It's not a dildo, it's a back massager from Duane Reade.

--Christopher & 7th

Girl: I've got my Reisens and my vibrator, and I'm all set!

--Duane Reade, Montague & Court, Brooklyn

Young woman turning to male friend: So, bud, conquered any good buttplugs lately?

--6 train

Girl whispering: I think that girl in line behind me just read this text about rubber pussy cups!

--Victoria's Secret dressing room

20-something guy to pals at brunch: I'm tired of being the guy with all the good sex toys!

--56th & 9th