Little girl to people waiting to board plane: You want a grandma? We have hundreds of grandmas here. –LaGuardia Overheard by: detective olivia benson Grandma, about child running with others: He runs faster than… than a little shit. –Alice in Wonderland Statue, Central Park Mom to kid: Do you know that purse I stole from Grandma? Hide it. She’s coming over. –Brooklyn Overheard by: Jeff Grandma: If I was 50, boy, I’d be nifty. [Granddaughter stares blankly.] Yeah, if I was 50, I’d wear a leather bustiere. –C train Woman on payphone: I don’t care if Johnny was fucking his cousin, that don’t give you the right to steal your grandma’s credit cards! –125th & Lex