Man to woman and her friend pushing a stroller: Listen, Jeanie, you like my sperm, and I like your car. I’m sure we can make a deal. –60th & Central Park South Firefighter after getting a call: Hey, boss, how many one-way streets do you think I can drive down the wrong way? –Pathmark under Manhattan Bridge Overheard by: tj Midwestern woman in preppy clothes sticking head out passenger window of sedan: Excuse me, we’re trying to merge… –Waiting to enter Lincoln Tunnel Overheard by: Angela Homeless musician with Casio keyboard plays entire intro to ‘Oye Como Va,’ then sings: Oye como va, ba da da, blah blah blah blah blah! [Abruptly stops] Well, ladies and gentlemen, that’s what you get for not having a car. –L train to Williamsburg Overheard by: Subway Goer