Female conductor over speaker: Oh, I know you did not! If you wanna wait for your friends, you wait on the platform — do not hold my motherfucking doors! –Manhattan-bound 1 train, 225th St Young suit to another: I’m introducing you as a good friend of mine from the Bank of America, just so you know. –Houston & Varick Overheard by: Harriet Vane Middle-aged B&T lady: She told me she had no trouble with her friend dying in her apartment. –375 Hudson St Overheard by: Harriet Vane White chick: When I was younger I used to fart really loud every time I laughed. I think that’s why I didn’t have any friends. –Bed-Stuy Overheard by: MaryAnnaise Five-year-old boy throwing wad of trash at younger brother: Say hello to my little friend! –15th & 7th, Brooklyn Overheard by: nyamelia Tired man on cell: You harassed me, you harassed my friends, and you cut up all my furniture… I don’t know what else there is to talk about. –Steinway & Broadway, Astoria Overheard by: Czarina Tween: Yeah, and then I made my friend scratch my back with his claws… And then I got ringworm. –Q train, 8th & Broadway Overheard by: worldfamouscats.com