Trendy Asian girl on cell: So, Max came over last night and we were in the kitchen, and he lifted me up onto the counter and was like, ‘I am gonna fuck you so hard,’ and I was like, ‘Whoa, oh my god!’ But I couldn’t go through with it. So he walked over to the fridge, opened it up, and put his head inside and started, like, banging his head against the wall. I know, can you believe that? –LIRR Overheard by: Emily Leatrice Hipster: I’d feel more comfortable in a sex club than going on a date. –Penn Station Hot chick on cell: Yes! Yes! O-M-G! We are sooo going to have a sex-a-thon! Get the girls together, my place, tonight! [To gawking passengers] Sex and the City -athon. Fucking perverts. W-T-F. –N train Overheard by: not invited Teacher: Every time you put a penis into a vagina you’re risking sex. –Health Class, LaGuardia HS Overheard by: mf Girl: I heard two people having really loud sex on my floor last night. It was either gay guys or Asians, I couldn’t tell. –Cafeteria, Manhattan School of Music Overheard by: Christiana Little Fat suit: He made me watch while he fucked some girl, so I’m gonna make him watch while I fuck some guy! –Astor Pl Overheard by: Glad I wasn’t the other guy… 20-ish chick: What? I fornicate all the time, and I’ve never been arrested! –Subway station Overheard by: subwayrider