What a Dump

Men #1 & #2: What is that?!
Man #3: Yep, yep, that's me! Sorry, sorry! It's me. I just don't understand it -- I've never shit my pants in my entire life!
Man #4: That's disgusting!
Man #3: Sorry, sorry.
Elevator operator: Welcome to New York City.

--Elevator at W Hotel, Union Square