Drunk guy #1: You know Fabrizio is banging Heather, right?
Drunk guy #2: No, really?
Drunk guy #1: Yeah, he’s bangin’ the shit out of her — throwing her around the room and shit.
Drunk guy #2: Hehehe.
Drunk guy #1: He had her at her parents’ house and went for six hours non-stop.
Drunk guy #2: Wow.
Drunk guy #1: Of course, he’s 23 years old. For me to go six hours non-stop I need a little blue help. You know, some blue help — especially with all the stuff I do [holds hand up to nose simulating doing a bump], y’know what I mean? [Suddenly turns to lady with Lord & Taylor bag] Lord and Taylor — that place is the best. It’s just like Neiman Marcus, but for a hundred bucks more you get a cappuccino and a shoe shine. It’s worth it, right?

–Brooklyn-bound F train

Overheard by: Leticia