20-something chick: You know, Hillary, this is the time in your life when you can go to work hung over.

–Shiki, St. Mark’s & 1st

Overheard by: Alison R.

Subway musician: Hey, boys and girls, today is Take Your Kid to Work Day. Yeah, take your kid to work, leave them, and go to TGI-Friday’s! Read the contract, kids!

–Grand Central

Overheard by: Scott

Black man on cell: What ’bout that shorty you work with? No, not the thick one… Yeah, the juicy one.

–Elevator, 605 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Sudden urge to eat steak

Tall man on cell: I wasn’t drinking on the job! I was drinking before the job even started!

–Liberty & Church

Overheard by: pollie

Girl to boyfriend: Can’t you be good at something besides getting fired?

–36th & Madison