Balding 40-something: I’m a coed! Don’t laugh — I am a hot coed! –Columbia University Drunken cheerleader to fat friend: We’re the hottest non-lesbian girl couple ever. –68th & Lex Thug to friends: Yo, it’s too damn hot to be messin’ with the females today. –Union St & 4th Ave, Park Slope Overheard by: Confabulation Nation Teen program chick: … And even if it’s really, really hot outside, you are not supposed to sleep with a fan directly on you. –Columbia University