Tourist mom to daughter: This is a train station. –Lobby of the MetLife building Tourist on cell: I just humped Timmy in Times Square! –Times Square Tourist girl to no one, pointing out window: Oh my god, they actually have carts in New York that sell pretzels?! It’s actually true?! –Boston-bound Greyhound Tourist girl to boyfriend: Wow, New York is just like Ohio! –Fast food corridor, Penn Station Overheard by: Bean Tourist to guide: Is it illegal to pick your nose in America? –79th & 5th Tourist kid: So, this has nothing to do with batteries? –Battery Park Overheard by: Good thing I have an iPhone