Wednesday One-Liners Are a Part of Your Complete Breakfast

Exhausted executive: Woman, I am telling you -- it is Friday, and what I'm saying to you is, all I need is some alcohol and some stuffed mushrooms. Do you hear me?

--Grand Central

Old lady, screaming: It's not the quiche, Harry, it's the whole seven years!

--Lincoln Center

Overheard by: Rowanhood

Creepster: I'd like to spread Jessica Fletcher and Rose Nylund on a cracker and down 'em with a shot of Ensure!

--81st & Madison

Man: I don't trust upstate food anymore.

--Cab line, JFK

Overheard by: Sean McGurr

Budding entrepreneur: You mean, I can copyright the sandwiches I make? Put them in an envelope and mail them to myself?

--Stanton & Attorney