Teacher: No butt-fuck guys, no butt-fuck.

–Hunter College High

Overheard by: citysnidget

Hot chick: … And so I was thinking, You’re thinking about my brother while you’re fucking my ass? No response necessary.

–32nd & Broadway

Cuban guy to Russian girl: All Russian girls I’ve ever met love anal sex. No, seriously, they are all into that shit — and pomegranate.

–1st Ave

Overheard by: Asmar

Jock: … And he was sodomizing a jaguar.

–81st & Amsterdam

Overheard by: impossible