This Is the Dawning of the Age of Wednesday One-Liners

Teen girl on cell: He started laughing and calling me a moron when we were drunk and I asked him if the sun and the moon were the same thing, and I told him, 'If you had my brain, you'd understand what I meant!'

--Penn Station

Redhead: He and I are like twin stars that will never have sex.

--Starbucks, 95th & Broadway

Overheard by: ein ladle

Bimbette: Does the U.S. own the moon?

--Astronomy 101, Borough of Manhattan Community College

Dork to gaggle of girls: A half moon is fuckin' half as full as a full moon, ya heard?!

--East Village

Overheard by: Verbena