Professor: If you are selected, meet me and talk to me about the presentation on Thursday, and you can take advantage of me. [Awkward pause, then] If you want to rape me, you are welcome to try, but I don’t think so because I am pretty strong. –NYU Overheard by: Ting Political philosophy professor after oral surgery: I had a choice to make: I could have stayed home like a happy clam on Percocet, or I could teach class… I miss the Percocet. –Hunter College Overheard by: tanechka Computer science professor: They [people who figured out which mushrooms were poisonous] were the true pioneers. Screw Edison! –NYU Professor: Don’t get too excited — I’m not putting you into groups. Yeah, I saw you all sitting there, looking around, thinking ‘Which of these fuckers is going to do all of the work?’ –Fordham University Professor: Okay, you guys fill out these course evaluations, and I’ll go amuse myself for 15 minutes by… doing drugs or something [leaves room]. –Waverly Building, NYU Overheard by: evanescent English professor: I can never find enough excuses to use the word ‘pus.’ –Hunter College Overheard by: upperwestsider