Your Grandfather Had a Boyfriend? That's So Cool!

Boyfriend: Have you ever heard of the Grinch Who Stole Christmas?
Girlfriend: No, wait... Isn't that your grandfather?
Boyfriend: No... My grandfather's boyfriend was a kleptomaniac. Every Christmas my grandfather would have to rip all the tags off of everything so that no one would know that his boyfriend stole all the gifts.

--6 train