Wednesday One-Liners Get Lockjaw

Thug: I really gotta figure out a new way to ask for a blowjob.

--Soho

Overheard by: Emily McInerney

Guy to coworkers: So wait, a blowjob is exactly like sitting on a toilet?

--40th & 6th

Lady: Oy! Don't even get me started... Unless we're talking about gay men blowing each other, in which case, I have no problem with that.

--Columbia University

Overheard by: Ladle

Drunk girl to friend hooking up: Just suck his dick and let's go...

--Bar, Brooklyn

Chick on cell: Ah, bottle fellatio. I remember doing that in high school for a bunch of guys.

--Amtrak into Penn Station

Overheard by: Ladle

Teen after HIV workshop: Yo, don't have anal, bro. Get your penis licked!

--Banana Kelly High School, Bronx

Overheard by: nooners