Woman to little girl: You haven’t hit puberty yet, so you’re still a midget.

–Bloomingdale’s

Overheard by: Emily B.

Little pig-tailed girl, pointing: Look, Daddy! It’s the dwarf from the OTB!

–Court St

Overheard by: katattack

Man selling books, to lady with kid: Check out these baby carriages! There could be an Al-Qaeda midget or something in there… with a machine gun.

–80th & Broadway

Overheard by: Molly

Chick: You’re right! My best friend is gay, and they’re worse than midgets!

–55th & 3rd