Tourist: I don’t like this train line. On the L line they have benches so that you can kneel down and pray… And they don’t have crevices digging into your ass and shit. –1 train Tourist girl: Let’s go to the Upper Wet Side. –Palace Theatre, Broadway Tourist: You haven’t been raped and stabbed ’til you’ve been raped and stabbed in New York. –Central Park Dude with huge backpack, clutching a map: Sometimes you just don’t want to see a huge ball of twine, y’know? It’s, like, 200 miles away. [Guy next to him nods head vigorously.] –Manhattan-bound L train Middle-aged tourist on cell: No, we gotta go to Penn Central. Trust me, I know this place — we gotta get to Penn Central. –Penn Station