High-school teen to friend: So, like, every guy that likes me must totally be a pedophile. –Flatbush & Dekalb, Brooklyn 13-year-old: I mean, he’s not a pedophile, he’s just very open with his sexuality, and I like that. –8th & Broadway Overheard by: Kelly Lesbian on cell: I just saw these girls and they were pretty. Really pretty. And fifteen. But then I heard them talking and I realized they were French! So it’s fine. Fifteen is legal there. –36th St & Fifth Ave Middle-aged teacher: I have this girl in my class that’s a six-year-old with a 46-year-old woman’s body. –Prem-On Thai Overheard by: office peon Guy who just got more beer: This is the happiest place on earth… Except for that kindergarten I’m not allowed to go back to anymore. –McSorley’s, 7th & 3rd Overheard by: I’ll drink to that! Seven-year-old boy running after another child: I’m a pedophile! I’m a pedophile! I’m a pedophile! –Coney Island Boardwalk Overheard by: that’swhathesaid