Wednesday One-Liners Are One Baaaad Mother-- Shut Yo' Mouth!

Cute JAP talking about all the stuff she gets: I don't need a man, I have my mom.

--Rare View Bar

Overheard by: white guy

Blonde girl to male friend: Listen, John. Fifteen minutes, your mom. Fifteen minutes, your mom.

--R Train

Annoying 40-something new mom: A good mom always has a diaper in her pocket!

--Barnes & Noble, 18th & 5th

Overheard by: I Am McLovey

Coworker: I got a bootleg mother.

--Midtown

Window-shopping tourist to wife: Look, honey! It's the dress your mother wore when they buried her!

--Union Square

Overheard by: CJ

Guy: I go over to the house for Mother's Day and she yells at me for not calling her for Mother's Day like my brother did. So I go outside and call her from my cell and say "happy Mother's Day!" and she yells at me for being an idiot.

--37th & 7th