Wednesday One-Liners Know When to Stop

Bus driver: We should be arriving in Port Authority soon, hopefully at our schedule arrival time, but it all depends on the Lord of the tunnel.

--Port Authority Bus

Overheard by: Emily

M60 bus driver, under breath, to traffic ahead: Mush. Mush. Yeah, mule. Mush. Git along.

--106th & West End

Bus driver on PA: Madam, don't let your children swing on the hand bars...this is not a jail.

--M15 Bus

Overheard by: bonoboxoxo

Funny bus driver in soft-spoken jazz voice: This is Madison Avenue. If this is you, get out. I wish I was getting out. Does anyone know how to get out? Next is Park Avenue...or it's not. Is anyone listening? Thanks for the smile.

--M16 Crosstown Bus

Announcer on bus (waiting for someone to request a stop): Come on, my line's open. Someone dial my number. Come on, you know the number! (a passenger requests a stop) There we go! Thanks for calling! I knew you would!

--M16 Bus

Overheard by: alli