Man: Is this the happy train? (no reply) Oh, this is the depressed train. Who wants spare change? –N Train Overheard by: ellen. Big old Russian guy: So vhy you drink? You drink ven you are happy, and you drink ven you are sad. Me, I am either happy, or I am sad. So me, I am drinking all the time! –Deli, 83rd & York Overheard by: Zinny Large woman on cell: I wanted to suck away your happiness, do you understand? I just wanted to suck it away! –Grand Central Station Girl on cell: Yeah, no. So then he pulls the rubber duck out of his (lowers voice) ass and says he loves me. Yeah, for the first time, I was so happy… –B Train