Train conductor: East Broadway, welcome to Manhattan. Especially you, tourists, you put my wife on the table–I mean, uh…my food. –F Train Overheard by: penelope Petite 30-something washing clothes: Oh, no! His wife's gonna be there. I gotta get some razor blades. –Laundry Mat, Broadway & Bushwick, Brooklyn Overheard by: Matt Middle aged suit to another: So the main problem my girlfriend and I have is that I really get along with my wife. –A Train Overheard by: Suzi Thug to friend: There's just one thing I want people to say about my wife. Not that she's pretty, or that she's nice. I want them to say, "man, that nigga's wife's got a fat ass!" –Grand Concourse Cop to crowd: I suggest you use the other crosswalk, it's less congested. Stay here, risk your life…over there, save your wife! –Radio City Music Hall Man on cell: You don't love your wife?! (pause) Fuck you! –42nd St & 7th Ave Overheard by: Amina