Large woman attempting to sit down: Y'all better slide down, cause my ass is wide! –Downtown 4 Train Overheard by: squished Limping black hobo to preppy white male: Maaaaan…what's that got to do with wiping yo' ass? –10th Ave b/w 50th & 51st Middle aged man to daughter: Come on, let's go look for baby bottle butt! –H Mart Professor: I got excited because another man touched my ass in public! –Fordham University, Lincoln Center Overheard by: Haven't we all? Seated man to mom letting her child run around restaurant: Your daughter just put her hand in my butt crack. –Park Slope