Conductor: This is the 3:07 off peak train to Huntington. Stopping at Woodside, Jamaica, New Hyde Park…blah, blah, blah, you get the idea. Watch the gap. (clicks microphone off) –LIRR Conductor: There's a 2 express train right across the platform. Ready, set, go! –1 Train Conductor: There's a Brighton Beach-bound b train across the platform. Say that three times fast. –F Train Overheard by: Thom Cohen Conductor: Ladies and gentleman, I have a very important announcement: this is not the last helicopter out of Saigon. I repeat, this is not the last helicopter out of Saigon. There will be another train after this one, and another one after that. –Downtown 2 Train Train conductor: This message is for the young man who stepped to the edge of the platform at the front of the train. This train feels no pain, this train has no brain. How about you? –Downtown A Train Overheard by: Guitarbuyer Bus driver: This is East 18th Street. If you get off here, you'll be at the q train faster. If you choose to not use your god-given walking ability, the q train is next. –B11 Bus Overheard by: not using her god given walking ability Conductor: This is 96th Street. Next stop, 103rd. Everyone ready? And away we go! –1 Train Overheard by: Ali