Eve Went on to Ruin Everything for Everyone

Crazy lady, pointing at Christmas tree: Is the tree real?
Doorman: Yes, ma'am.
Crazy lady: Can I go smell the tree?
Doorman: Yes, ma'am.
Crazy lady, going over to tree: Can ah smell yo, tree? (giggles)

--Upper West Side

Overheard by: Neck Twister