Student to professor: Yeah, man, you know, because every time I slap you five, now I feel like I'm slapping your father's ass. –Suffolk County Community College Overheard by: Wish I was paying attention Trashy sista' on cell: Did you know you've been nominated for an award? (pause) Yeah, I know! I mean, it's just nice to even be nominated, issa' honor. Yeah, you wanna know whacha been nominated for? You been nominated for the world's biggest deadbeat daddy! –Duane Reade Overheard by: I don't work here Demi-bum to another, looking at postcards at a convenience store: Oh, I want to send a postcard to my father: Doing shitty, wish you cared! –Fulton & Water Teen girl to friend: Of course I got him tested!…but he wasn't the father either. –145th & Broadway Guard: Did you hear about that 9-year-old girl who gave birth to her own twin? I'm serious! It was inside her stomach and then she gave birth to it. And the craziest part is that the twin was from another father! –74th & Madison Latina girl to friend: You know, I don't even know what I saw in that loser. I should've dumped his ass the first time he tried hitting on my dad! –58th & 6th Overheard by: Tim J.