Girl to friend: I told him you had fucking mad STDs because he said he wanted to fuck you. (pause) You're welcome! –Washington Square Park Suit exiting cab: Yo, make sure you don't give him your number. He's got crabs. –30th Ave & 30th St, Astoria Overheard by: OhKellyO Blonde 20-something on phone: Either the universe just proved there is no god, or he is a motherfucking cunt! (pauses, then in low tone) Because… I think I have herpes. –Battery Park Overheard by: close enough to hear the herpes part Thug to thugette: I didn't have warts on my body till I met you. –Metro North Overheard by: baconista Guy on cell, leaning casually against fire hydrant: Hey, so, I just got my test results back, and… uh… so I got herpes. So… maybe you should get yourself tested. (pause) No, no, no. No. No! Dammit, Jessica, listen, I… fuck. Sorry, Jennifer. No, I–no, I'm sorry, I've just been making this call a lot today. (pause) Hello? –Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn Overheard by: Kytt