Conjoined, Bearded Wednesday One-Liners

Girl on phone: You know her, red hair, goes to a lot of shows... Her lip is kind of, y'know, stuck to her nose a bit on the one side.

--Union Square

Promoter to older man passing by: Excuse me, sir, you dropped your clitoris.

--St.Mark's Place

Suit: And his head was askew...

--79th St & Central Park West

Overheard by: Ladle

Suit on cell: The woman's toenails were three inches long.

--The Village

Guy to another: I knew a guy with a tail--an extended tailbone. It was thiiiis (shows) long!

--8th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: Rick

50-something New Yorker: He was Barbara Streisand's cousin! And he stretched my urethra. It was great! Well, not at the time. But now it's great!

--Broadway & 59th St

Overheard by: Nikki