You Know You're Drunk When the Evening Ends in a Bookstore

Obviously inebriated brunette: So... I'm pretty sure I'm going to die tonight.
Obviously inebriated blonde: Well, if we do, I think I should put up a Facebook status so everyone knows.
Obviously inebriated brunette: I'm pretty sure the tox screen will show it.
(ten seconds later)
Obviously inebriated brunette: Kill me. Oh, wait, no need. I'll be dead in three hours.
Obviously inebriated blonde: Just don't go dying in my bed... that's creepy.
(five seconds later)
Obviously inebriated brunette: Um... did you just burp?
Obviously inebriated blonde: Yeah. Why?
Obviously inebriated brunette: Because it just went up my nose.
Obviously inebriated blonde: Now... that's legendary.

--Barnes & Noble, Midtown

Overheard by: NYLove