Teen to friends: I want to get a haircut, but every time I get a haircut I get arrested. –Union Square Cashier: This line is closed! Unless one of y'all wants to drive me to my hair appointment! –Home Depot Woman to friend: Why can't he have a normal man haircut? Like, with short sides? –Dekalb Ave & Oxford Overheard by: Daniel Boris Dzula Manic lady to no one in particular: Pay homage to my hair! –B61 Bus Drunk hipster: Donald Trump's hair is the Blarney Stone of New York. –East Village Overheard by: Concerned Irishman