Irritated tourist mother to baffled seven-year-old daughter: Your father is such a fuckin' dickwad! And let me tell you–he wasn't even inspired the night we made you. –Times Square Overheard by: tinyfoo Guy on cell: I haven't talked to my dad in over three years, and this morning he friended me on Facebook. –1st Ave & 89th Street Overheard by: Citats Guy on cell: Well, I wouldn't say I have the best relationship with my father, no. Umm… Well, for example, if he answers the phone when I call the house he says "Oh. Hey, failure." –Union Square Overheard by: Olivia Woman on cell to friend: Uh-huh girl, I brought William to his donors' house and he didn't want to watch him. I said "William, William, say goodbye to your donor because he don't wanna watch you today." –Bay Ridge, Brooklyn Upper East Side girl at brunch with girlfriends: I need to find a new apartment because when I do the walk of shame I keep running into my dad. –80th St & 2nd Ave