Female student on cell: We don't know anything until we know something. –Columbia University Balding middle aged man guiding middle aged woman down stairs: Step, step, step, step. Flat, flat, flat, flat. Step… –Columbia Yoga instructor to skinny college girl: Turn your head to the left. Turn your head to the left. The left. The left. The left. Your other left. I know you go to Columbia. –Bikram Yoga, Harlem Overcaffinated Columbia freshman girl to another: What do you mean your sociology textbook ate King Lear? –Carman Hall, Columbia University Overheard by: that would make it difficult to finish either reading