Inebriated frat guy to another: No, you drunk asshole, it's the Mongolian bakery!

–Columbus & W 70th

Overheard by: JKK

Frat boy: I'm Brad Pitt's brother! Who do you think you're cutting corners with?

–Union Square

Bro, loudly: Beer pong is about drinking and winning.

–13th St & Broadway

Overheard by: Basket

Pre-teen to another: I was breastfed by a fat boy!

–Union Square