Sure, Lisa, Some Magical Wednesday One-Liner….

Dude with chick to group of smokers outside bar: We are going to eat pork chops and fuck. –Bleecker and Crosby Gay male on cell: …Do you really think I would try his sausage balls? –53rd St & 8th Ave Budget Vin Diesel: I love bacon. If I could, I would put bacon in my cereal. –Sunburnt Cow, Avenue C Overheard by: LeahPia77 Hispanic deli worker: Es muy barato, como la carne de gato. –10th & Broadway Overheard by: Anna Pilar Black man, to Jewish friend: You’re not Jewish. You had bacon at your baby’s naming ceremony. Thickest, juiciest most delicious bacon I ever ate in my life. You named your kid Samuel and you had bacon. Delicious, delicious bacon. –A Train Man on cell phone: The sausages! I mean, I don’t feel bad for the hot dogs. But, the sausages?! –41st and 7th Overheard by: Justin

Grand Slam Wednesday One-Liners

Man selling CDs: If you like the Mets, you will love my album! –8th & Broadway Overheard by: nicole Mets fan: I don’t care if I have one lung, or only have half a pancreas, or if I lose a leg falling in front of the train. As long as the Mets win, I’m good to go. –7 train Asshole, pointing to guy with Red Sox bumper sticker on his wheelchair: He’s a Boston fan; let’s kick his ass! Oh wait, looks like God beat us to it. –126th & St Nick Conductor, on PA: That Johnny Damon. He sure looks like Jesus. But he sure throws like my little sister. –Amtrak train out of Penn Station Overheard by: Lisita MTA worker: All people for the Mets game, go to your right. All people for the US Open, if any, go to your left. –Willets Point-Shea Stadium subway station Overheard by: Emily Thugette: Yo, when I make it in show business, I will not speak to Ben Affleck. When I found out he’s a Red Sox fan, I decided then and there. –Q65 bus Overheard by: A White Bear Conductor: 161st Street, Yankee Stadium. Let Big Papi know who the real MVP is. –D train Overheard by: Lindsay J.