Overheard In New York

Archive for June, 2005

He’s Just Not That Into Your Calendar

Girl #1: So he told me that no matter what happens on June 31st, he will come to my house and we’ll discuss our wedding.
Girl #2: I wish my boyfriend would be there for me.
Girl #1: It sounds nice, doesn’t it? Except there is no 31st of June. –Washington Square Park Overheard by: Ting Catholic schoolgirl: I am so mature! I’m gonna be 16 soon. That means I can drive.
Boyfriend: That’s awesome.
Catholic schoolgirl: How many months is that in?
Boyfriend: I dunno…
Catholic schoolgirl: Let’s see…June, July, August, September, November…December? No, that’s not right…January, February, April, May… –N train Overheard by: Olga Kogan

Maybe She Wasn’t Standing When Her Water Broke

Chick #1: What’s the deal with Mimi, anyway? She’s been pregnant for a while.
Chick #2: I know. I’m beginning to think she’s just fat. –Mimi Maternity, 87th & Broadway Overheard by: Djlindee

Not One As Widespread as Idiocy

Girl #1: They named their kid Lotus?
Girl #2: That’s kind of cool.
Girl #1: How?
Girl #2: Well, it’s got good connotations, you know? I mean, you’d never meet a bitch named Lotus.
Girl #1: Yeah, but…weren’t they, like, a plague? –John Fluevog, Mulberry Street Overheard by: Courtney

Overheard on the Radio

The creators of this site were just on The Brian Lehrer Show (listen here). As the producer explained to the host who we were and what we’re about, she handed him some printouts of site quotes and ended with: …and don’t say fucktard, obviously. –Centre Street office

It’s Hungry for a Baby

College boy #1: Did you see the camel toe on her? It was like her vagina was hungry or something.
College boy #2: Yeah, she had a ravenous vagina. –Brooklyn College Overheard by: Brooklyn Julie

No, That’s Alcoholautism

Arty girl: You know what Asperger’s is, right?
Arty guy: No.
Arty girl: It’s that type of Autism where people are obsessed with trains.
Arty guy: Oh! So is that what all the subway conductors have? –F train

I Think I’m Going to Be Sick

Girl #1: She looks so good now, though!
Girl #2: Yeah, well, if she would keep a meal down once in a while she might not… –9th Avenue & Little West 12th Street Overheard by: Wyatt Neumann Girl #1: They were all wondering why I wasn’t eating, and they kept asking me to eat something, so I just finally had a sandwich to shut them up. So when I went back to the hotel, I threw up.
Girl #2: I totally understand, I would have done the same thing. –NYSC locker room, 23rd & Park

We Love It When Our Friends Become Successful

For those of you into voyeurism and candor, the website Double Agent is based on the premise of “women spying on women for men.” We asked the guys over there for some recommendations of their work, and these fly-on-the-wall video clips are what they came up with: 1, 2, 3, 4. Enjoy!

Don’t Give a Guy Ideas

Girl: You don’t like hot dogs?
Guy: Only at baseball games.
Girl: Well, we could go downstairs and, like, throw a bat around. –59th Street office