Wasted guy: Oh man. I just shit my pants…I can’t believe I shit my pants. –Carroll Gardens
Teen guy: Yeah, I fucked that retarded girl. She didn’t really know what was going on…but I busted in her. –Cobble Hill Overheard by: Philec
Crazy man: Why do blondes only hang out with other blondes? Why do blondes only hang out with other blonds? Why do blonds only hang out with other blonds?
Chick: Shut up.
Crazy man: Hey Blondie, I wasn’t asking you. –Washington Square Park Overheard by: Thompson Patton
Guy #1: So we’re entering the West Village.
Guy #2: Oh yeah?
Guy #1: Yeah…it’s sort of…the gay part of town.
Guy #2: Yeah? So…is there, like…a gay bar in the area we could go to? –Washington Square Park Overheard by: kjd
B&T guy: Do you know where Ludlow Street is?
Woman: It’s that way, towards Jersey. –Stanton & Suffolk
Drunk chick #1: Look, I have, like, fucking trackmarks. It’s like a hole!
Drunk chick #2: Oh my God! It looks like a teddy bear! –W. 4th between 6th & 7th Overheard by: Kaitlen
Woman #1: I was watching this travel show the other night, and there was a bit about this cathedral in Prague built entirely out of bones.
Woman #2: Human bones?
Woman #1: Yeah. I think it was done as a memorial to the Jews that died in World War II. –Michael Jordan’s Steak House, Vanderbilt Avenue
Girl: Oh my God! I meant to tell you!
Girl: Yesterday I was walking on 5th Avenue and this horde of middle-aged women stopped me to ask where I got my Ralph Lauren shirt.
Guy: No way!
Girl: It was great.
Guy: The one with the big horse on it?
Girl: It’s a pony, not a horse!
Guy: What’s the difference?
Girl: It’s different.
Guy: Can you explain the difference?
Girl: No. –Rockefeller Center Overheard by: pixelvisions
Boy inside elevator: Going up?
Boy outside elevator: I’m going down.
Boy inside elevator: Well, I’m in the elevator, and I’m going up.
Boy outside elevator: Oh…fine, be that way. –Lafeyette Street Residence Guy #1: Dude, you still sleeping in the closet?
Guy #2: Yeah.
Guy #1: You got an air mattress or anything in there yet?
Guy #2: Yeah, I’ve got a little mattress in there now. Still pretty sad though…I’m also drunk. –East Campus dorm, Columbia University Overheard by: merrellham
Tourist girl #1: It’s like the Space Needle, only with wire.
Tourist girl #2: And red. –Coney Island Overheard by: Lindsey Moore