Archive for 2005

What An Ass

Guy: I don’t want to be drunk in front of her.
Girl: What? Why not?
Guy: I don’t want her to see me like that.
Girl: But face down on the floor is really the only way to see you. –84th & 2nd Overheard by: mortimer stackendanch

It’s Official: Dark Sarcasm is Over

Industrial guy: Do you guys like noise?
Hipster guy #1: Um…no, I’m really into organized sound.
Hipster guy #2: Yeah, I’m really getting into silence…like that. –Astoria Overheard by: Jeremy Valeda Hipster guy #1: I’m trying to get a caffeine buzz going.
Hipster guy #2: Why don’t you just think about the impending blackness that will eventually envelope us all…That should keep you awake. –Knitting Factory, Leonard Street

Ten Years, Give or Take

Old man #1: …so she processes it and hands me back the form and it hits me like a ton of bricks: Senior! I’m a senior now! Do I look like a senior?
Old man #2: …How long do I have to answer that? –Elevator, Worth & Church Overheard by: Cap’n Mid-nite

Hey, It’s Kind of What They Came Here For

Southern woman: Excuse me, sir? We aren’t from around here but could you tell me where Times Square is?
NY Man: Yeah, it’s a bit uptown from here, you’re lookin’ for 125th street. It’ll say Harlem but don’t let it throw you off. –Times Square Overheard by: Carl Krickmire Tourist guy: Excuse me, where is the subway?
NY guy: Sorry, I don’t speak English. –Rockefeller Center