Archive for 2005

Mortified Laughter: The Cure for Boredom

Two guys and a girl enter the hospital and ask for the restroom. A few minutes later as they’re leaving the building the security guard talks to them. Security guard: That’ll be $20.
Guy: What?
Security guard: Ain’t nothing for free at the hospital…unless you have an insurance card. Have a good night folks! –Mount Sinai hospital, 5th Avenue Overheard by: Vanilla World-famous doctor: Do you know what I love? Dyslexic Black people. For instance, the other day a Black guy stopped me in his car as I was walking and asked me, “How do I get to the FRD?”. –Tisch hospital, 33rd Street

Overheard Goes to the Midnight Premiere

Stormtrooper: Man, I can’t even move in this thing. Star Wars geek #1: They said no dueling.
Star Wars girlfriend: No lightsaber duels?
Star Wars geek #2: No, the’re no lightsaber dueling in the theater.
Star Wars geek #1: But they’re dueling.
Star Wars girlfriend: Yeah, but he’s Yoda. Lady: Look, I’ve been saving this seat since Attack of the Clones. Dude: Cool lightsaber.
Dork: Thanks.
Dude: Where’d you get it? Geek.com?
Dork: No. Borders. –Ziegfeld theater, 54th Street Nerd: At this point, my expectations are so low, as long as Darth Vader’s in it and a lot of people get killed, I’ll be happy. –Ziegfeld theater, 54th Street Overheard by: Todd Seavey Fanboy: That was great. Now all we need is the technology from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind to erase the first two. –Ziegfeld theater, 54th Street Overheard by: Jaybill McCarthy