Archive for 2005

If There Were, That Would Be a Great School Trip

Lady: I’m looking for non-leather shoes.
Saleswoman: Why non-leather?
Lady: I’m vegan. I don’t wear any animal products.
Saleswoman: Well, they don’t kill the cows to get the leather.
Lady: Where do you think they get the leather from? Do you think there’s a bunch of skinless cows roaming a farm somewhere? –Forest Hills shoe store Overheard by: MG

There is, But It Involves Being Chained in a Dark Cave

Boyfriend: Baby, that was amazing last night.
Girlfriend: I know…
Boyfriend: Really. that was the best head you ever gave me. Easily in the top five.
Girlfriend: Top five ever? Or just from me?
Boyfriend: Um…
Girlfriend: Who was better than me?
Boyfriend: That’s a ridiculous question. There’s no Platonic ideal of blowjobs. –2nd Ave. & 5th St. Overheard by: Franklin