Archive for 2005

No Wonder Lady Windermere Carried a Fan

Chick: You know, I don’t believe Victorians shat.
Dude: Neither did they.
Chick: There is no way on Earth that what just came up from my system came up through theirs.
Dude: Surely not with that whole empire they were building. –Pax Wholesome Foods, Times Square

It Says Here the Patent is Held by One Blair Warner

Girl #1: Sometimes you get pissed because you see something in a magazine or on TV that you thought of before and people are stealing your super imaginative ideas. And then you think, it’s possible that different people think of the same things.
Girl #2: Yeah, like when your sister thought she invented George Clooney? –G train Overheard by: kristin

Standing, Not Sitting

Drunk chick: I had a boyfriend once. He wanted to stick a hot iron up my ass.
Sober guy: Well did he do it?
Drunk chick: I’m standing here, aren’t I? –Tasti D-lite, 4th Avenue