Too tan woman: It’s the first day in a week that no one has called me a psychopath….yet. –W. 66th between Broadway and Central Park West Guy: I thought when I got up I was going to lose control. Then it went away. –54th between 1st & 2nd Overheard by: Brandy Rowell Big guy: That girl’s a serial killer. She murders men and then leaves panties on their face. –47th Street & 5th Avenue Overheard by: Brian
Lady: If he could fuck like he makes quesadillas, I’d be a lucky woman. –Astoria deli Overheard by: Stuart Bridgett Guy on cell: True Spanish girls wear heels in a blizzard! –33rd Street & Park Avenue Overheard by: Chris D. Hobo (to Hispanic construction workers): Remember the Alamo! –34th & Madison Avenue
Fat black woman: Hey, watch where you’re going! Say “excuse me” instead of bumping into me like that. Don’t you know how to speak English?
Japanese girl: You need a diet! –Penn station Overheard by: JL
Customer: I see barley, but no beef.
Cafeteria worker: The beef has been melted into it. –MSKCC cafeteria
Dude #1: I never knew people actually lived on Staten Island.
Dude #2: I know!
Dude #1: I thought it was just a big mall.
Dude #2: With the Mafia…
Dude #1: And garbage…
Dude #2: I know!
Dude #1: You know what’s totally sad? I got a 1450 on my SATs. –A train
Girl #1: That’s a really nice tweed.
Girl #2: Oh, thanks. Wow.
Girl #1: Seriously, it’s amazing.
Girl #2: Yeah, I was really lucky. –30th & 5th
Martha Stewart is on a tabloid cover.
Hipster: Did you know she’s now on that Forbes list?
Sunglasses at night girl: The one with rich people?
Sunglasses at night girl: She’s not even a movie star. –Key Foods, Williamsburg
White guy: I’m a pretty liberal-minded guy. I don’t consider myself prejudiced or anything…
White girl: But..?
White guy: But I really don’t like Polish people. I mean, I can’t help it, I just don’t. –Union Square Overheard by: Kristen
Queer: My sister is so concerned about her son playing with dolls because it will turn him gay. I’m like, “It’s not because I was playing with dolls that I was gay, it was that I looked at a guy and got a hardon!”. –Japonica, University Place Overheard by: Rick T
Old woman: Did you see this play?
Old man: Yes.
Old woman: Well, do you know who the father of the baby is?
Old man: Well, I know it wasn’t me. –59th & Park