Archive for 2005

Elephant Man III: The Drunk

Drunk teen girl #1: We both really need to stop drinking, you’re drinking three times a week now.”
Drunk teen girl #2: Yeah, well, there’s nothing better to do around here.
Drunk teen girl #1: You’re turning into an alky.
Drunk teen girl #2: I’m not an alcoholist! –J train Overheard by: christina

Elephant Man II: Apple Girl

Girl #1: You know you can spell your name R-A-C-H-L-E too, right?
Girl #2: That’s Rach-lee.
Girl #1: No, the way it sounds listen to the LE, like “apple”. You don’t spell apple A-P-P-E-L.
Girl #2: Yeah, but that’s dumb because I am not an apple. –Sheepshead Bay station Overheard by: Lena Ner

Christ, He’s Still Not Quite Getting It

Man #1: I went to confession, to a priest. I unloaded some pretty bad things I done. He was a Jesuit, this priest was. He knew I was feeling bad, so he told me not to be hard on myself, that God loves me no matter what. Then he said God loves all of us, that he loved Hitler just as much as the Blessed Mother.
Man #2: That’s some pretty heavy shit. I’ll tell you this, if I were that priest I wouldn’t say that at a synagogue.
Man #1: Jeez, I didn’t think of that. –Carnegie Deli, 7th Avenue